Battle of Green Beans

World War Vegetables has been waged in the Fisher household. The parties involved are Parents vs. 4 and 1/2 year old. (I add the 1/2 because anytime you ask Jack how old he is he mentions it. So I feel that it is important detail ;) ) So far the battles have only been fought on the homefront but if they continue I am sure will go over-seas.

Tonight's menu was pork, corn and green beans. I got smart and I had Jack and Ryan help me clean, prepare and cook the vegetables. I explained what the choices were and let him, choose which one he wanted to eat. Jack decided he would wage war against green beans. I obliged and cut them small as he asked. Dinner started off great, he ate all of his pork and biscuit and then by the time the rest of us were done, his beans were still untouched. I offered him corn, let him know he would have 30 minutes to eat the beans and begin to clean up the kitchen. With 10 minutes remaining he announced, "I am not eat them." This time Tom explained, that's fine but that means you will take your bath and go to bed and stay there for the rest of the night.

I looked over at one point and I thought I saw him playing with his napkin. I was almost excited that he was smart enough to hide them. But the napkin was EMPTY. Then I looked over and I noticed his hands under the table...was he feeding them to Casey? NOPE!! Wow is there something wrong with me that I am hoping he is smart enough to try to get away with not eating them?

The timer runs out and he is escorted upstairs by his father for his bath. The bath finishes and I hear the boys giggle as they avoid getting dressed. Then you hear Jack cry "I DON'T WANT TO GO TO BED."

I don't know if there is a winnner in this battle. He didn't eat the beans and we are going to have to listen to him.

Conversations with an almost 4 year old

Jack is quickly approaching 4. It's weird that you can actually have a full on conversation and he tells stories that are actually quite detailed. Here a a few of his funny ones.

J: Mommy, today Ryan P kicked me in the "knuckles" it hurt so bad.
M: Did you tell Miss Carrie?
J: No, Miss Carrie was driving bus and Miss Kim was going home. So I told Miss Jackie.
M: What happened?
J: She said "Not nice, Ryan go sit on the bench." Then she got me a boo-boo ice and I put it on my pee-pee. It hurts to get kicked in the "knuckles"
M: I guess so


M: Jack, Santa is watching. Do you want to be on his nice list or his naughty list?
J: Maybe his naughty list
M: If you are on naughty list you don't get any presents.
J: Hmmm maybe the nice list.

An indication that my child has too many toys. At his birthday party he opened the Batman Castle that he got last year from Santa.
J: Wow a Batman castle! I always wanted one.
Later when we discussed he already had one he said he wanted to keep it. I tried to explain we didn't really need two and maybe he could pick something else.
J: Yeah but if we keep it, than my baby can play with the old one and I will keep the new one and then I don't have to share.

Every year my close friends and I get together for ChristmaKuh . The kids all got gifts. Addie got a Barbie and some clothes. As the other Moms were cleaning up I was playing with the kids. Also known as stripping and redressing Barbie. Sammy and Jack came over.
S: I want to play with Barbie.
A: There is only one.
S: I want a Barbie.
J: Me too!
Me: Sammy do you want a Ken so that maybe you can play Barbies with Addie?
S: Yea that would be okay.
J: I want a Ken too!

Jack is capable of taking care of himself in the bathroom. However, periodically he will yell from the bathroom "I'm DONE!!" Which translates to will someone come wipe my butt. We get a big kick out of it, because a larger version of Jack used to do the exact same thing. In the middle of Jack's birthday party we heard a "Daddy! Daddy, I'm done." It progressively got louder and more desperate. Turns out other 4 year olds do the same thing. :)

Needless to say they are keeping us entertained and that doesn't even include the stuff Ryan has been up to. :)

Oh the Joys of Motherhood

So this morning started out great. I got up and took the boys to walk in the Relay for Life for our daycare team. We met Aunt Jess and Max and walked with her. After about a 1/2 hour or so Jess noticed Jack was holding himself.

"Jack do you have to go potty?" Jess asked
"Yes, really bad." he answered dancing.

I left the two strollers with Jess and started running across the park carrying Jack. He began chanting uh-uh-uh as we ran. I looked at him and said "Don't pee on me." He looked innocently and said "It's bouncy." I promptly put him down and we ran the rest of the way hand in hand. After a miss with the potty we played at the playground for a while and then ended up going to the Coney Island with Coopers and Bauers.

At the Coney Island Jack went to the bathroom twice. We get in the car and make a 45 minute drive to Royal Oak. About 5 minutes from our destination he begins shouting from the back seat I have to go pee and poopy. I get to the place where we have to pick up the package, run in with Jack holding his privates and he makes it to the bathroom. We then drive about 20 minutes and stop at Target.

Jack had been asking for an Iron Man all day, he was pretty good so I decided to indulge. We are in line at Target when Jack begins again asking to go potty.

"Are you serious? You just went? You are just going to have to wait until Mommy pays. Are you serious? You just went? Hold it?" All came out of my mouth in rapid succession as we waited in line and he danced in the cart holding himself. Now to my defense, he asks to go all the time, everywhere. I think he likes to check out bathrooms. He knows that going to the bathroom gets him out of things for a few minutes. (like bed time, dinner, cleaning, etc) So I assumed this was just another example of that power struggle. As I became more annoyed with the inconvenience of it all, Jack makes a little noise and then says "I'm all wet." As he says this urine is pouring down his leg, through the cart and all over the floor. I calmly tell the cashier,

"I'm really sorry he just had an accident, you are going to need a mop or something." The cashier says "It's okay. It happens, I guess he really had to go." She then turns on her light, when the supervisor comes over she points at Jack, "He peed, we need a clean up and that cart is going to need to be hosed." I am now horrified. I lift Jack out of the cart, pick up Ryan and march out of the store. Jack is walking with his legs wide apart and whining, I'm wet. Then he stops and begins crying "I left my sunglasses." I whip around and march back in to the pee soaked cart to look for the sunglasses, meanwhile Jack is stopping traffic as he walks slowly with his pee soaked pants behind me. I am shouting "Come on!" as a young 20 something couple looks at me with judging eyes. I hear the Target workers talking, laughing, and complaining about cleaning up my kids urine. I check the cart, no glasses.
"They aren't there, they are probably in my bag. Regardless, let's go!" I grab Jack's hand and march out to the truck. I put Ryan in his car seat and strap him in. Put Jack in the passenger front seat and begin to change him. I had a clean pair of underwear for him but that was it. He was now clean, dry, and in just a t-shirt and underwear. (His socks and shoes were wet too.) I then put him in his car seat with the intent to go home.

Wrong! I cannot find my keys anywhere. I begin tearing my bag apart. I begin tearing my car apart. I take Ryan out of his car seat to make sure they aren't under him. I realize I cannot go back into the store because Jack is barely dressed. I cannot leave them in the car. I begin to panic. I called Tom to talk me down. We were a 1/2 hour from home but he said he would bring the extra keys. I took a deep breath and said I would figure it out. I flagged down a Target worker and embarrassed explained, "My son had an accident in the store, I have him changed but he in now in just underwear and I cannot find my keys. I think I may have dropped them in the store." He was very nice and asked if I looked in my bags-ya think? Then said he would check inside. Meanwhile a nice lady came over and said "I'm a mom, I've been there. Do you need a pull up?" I explained the pee soaked kid was now clean and dry, I just now had no way to leave Target without keys. The Target guy comes back out "They remembered you, there were no keys. Where else were you at?"

I began to tear the car d apart for the 5th or 6th time when I noticed the keys. When I put Jack in the front to clean him up, I must have set the keys on the dash. With all thrashing around I did, I must have knocked them, or they slid...anyway they ended up way in the front of my windshield under the wipers. Now do I flag down the Target guy again and tell him I found my keys? Do I call and tell the ladies at guest services? I probably should have, but I just threw the keys in the ignition and got the heck out dodge.

Sleep monster

My brother often says "You can't blame the Frankenstein for what he does, it's the doctor's fault for creating him." Keeping that in mind I am fully aware that the sleep monster I have created is my own fault.

Jack was a colicky baby. How we made it through those first six weeks is a total blur. He also would not nurse. But I was determined to breast feed, so I would get up and give him a bottle and then pump so every feeding was about an hour awake or so. Luckily by three months he would nurse so that was no longer an issue. Although there were still plenty. He would wake up every time you would put him down and it would take forever to get him back to sleep. We tried the cry-it out. I am a wimp and couldn't do it. I even bought ear plugs, but after a hour and 45 minutes I decided he was just as stubborn as we were and it was just cruel. So I rocked him. I slept with him. I put him to sleep on the boppy.

By the time he was one and in the toddler room he was napping just fine at daycare. According to his teachers after lunch he would get down from his chair, go to his cot and lay right down and go to sleep. This was not the case at home, so I thought huh we'll try it. I put the baby mattress on the floor. I would lay next to him on it till he fell asleep and then sneak out. This worked for a little while. Then one time he walked into his closet, got confused and couldn't find his way out. He would roll out of bed and cry or wander the upstairs crying. So we quickly got a toddler bed. Have you ever seen a grown person trying to lay in a toddler bed? Have you ever tried to lay in a toddler bed? I don't recommend it. It was tough on us but it was even worse on Jack. It took a couple of weeks before I figured it out but he would wake up with bruises. He thrashed around the bed so much that he was bumping himself and that was what was waking him up. This just wasn't working. We had a queen size bed in the guest room so that was where Jack and I ended up most nights.

When we got pregnant with Ryan I decided that we might as well make the guest room Jack's room. We put the mattress on the bed and bought a toddler rail. He was probably one of the only two year old with a queen size bed. The hitch, we still have to lay with him until he falls asleep. At one point and time he would ONLY let me put him down. If Tom had to do it for what ever reason we had nothing but tears. Now, Daddy can also put him Na-night. He is two and a half and we are still laying with him till he falls asleep. We sneak out of bed and if he wakes up we lay back down. He says "Mommy I snuggle you," and wraps himself around me like a boa constrictor.

I know there are parents who lay their children down and walk out of the room and don't see them to morning. There are times I long for that. I figure he isn't going to do this forever-right? (I hope, it may be weird when he has friends over at 10 years old) Maybe I did create my little sleep monster. but he won't be little forever and I am sure there will come a time that he will pretend he doesn't know me instead of demanding to be snuggled.

The sweetest thing

Yesterday Jack sat in my lap in the living room and he happened to notice our wedding pictures. This was our conversation.

"Mommy that you and Daddy." Jack said as he pointed at the pictures.
"Yep, that was at our wedding."
"You princess."
"Oh because of my dress, that's so nice."
"You B-utifull!! "
"Oh I love you!!"

This might have been one of the sweetest things I have ever heard!!